Anxiety on overload this morning. Much worry about being able to go back to work & money. Anxious about making calls, anxious about getting dressed, anxious about the pain, Cuntbunny has made a slight return but is being nicely suppressed by the Ammo & the Tranny Doll. Managed to get myself going with some encouragement from Sharon & a chat about what's making me worried. Need to remember that it's fine to tell other people, especially her these things. Being open is being so very helpful & making me feel some proximity to people again. The weird detachment the medication was causing seems to have worn off. Don't feel so floaty & was easier to get up & et Jack ready this morning. I'm going to put together a daily timetable to get myself used to getting up early & getting ready before Jack gets up to get myself used to being in that routine again. Need to experiment with the medication times to make sure the effects fit in with that. So I hope to have improved sufficiently for Monday to be work worthy, but I must remember to focus on the now & be in the present rather than getting distracted & worried about the future. Have been asking for help with things too, just asking, which seems to be helping a great deal. Not sure who I'm asking or how they're helping, but it helps.
I shall continue to wait for the phone.
I shall give my nails another coat.
I shall do some sewing & make a start on the ironing.
I shall have some lunch.
I shall have a slow walk to the school to collect Jack.
I shall have a nice evening watching Children in Need. Looking forward to the Dr Who bit of course.
I shall plant some more pansies in the garden. Put some in yesterday which made me feel quite nice. Might have accidentally hacked into a few bulbs though.
There goes the alarm to remind me to take pills. Lunch time. Calm time.
No comments:
Post a Comment